I'm always restless these days. I don't like waiting, but when I know it is required, I'm patient.
My goals are quiet some days, but they taunt me on others. When they taunt me, I can't sit still. I have to progress in reading, writing and living. If I don't make that progress fast enough, I feel lazy or like a failure. I watch people pass me by. I feel strapped in a chair during the middle of a race. Watching the clock during a test. Frustrated and angry with myself for not moving fast enough. So many obstacles block my path, and I want them to fall like dominos. But they aren't falling that way. Some collapse while others build from a bump in the road to a mountain made of stone.
I'm not good at rock climbing, and these mountains are not soft like dirt, or smooth like grass.
Any path I make must be through solid rock, and if that doesn't work, I must find a way to climb. Whether the steps are big or small, I have to take them and get past these problems. I have to reach my goal, and progress no matter how difficult it is. If I want to live my life, I have to find a way. This restlessness won't stop until I do.
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